Marriage Expectations vs. Realities: Why 50-50 Isn't the Key to Happiness

Hey there! Today, I want to chat with you about something that's been on my mind a lot lately – marriage expectations versus reality.

Do you remember those days before you got married? When you were engaged, and you had this picture-perfect vision of what your marriage would be like? I know I did! I thought it would be this equal partnership where we both worked, came home, and everything would magically fall into place!

But guess what? Reality hit, and it wasn't exactly what I imagined.

Marriage is not always 50-50, and that's totally fine. There are moments where one of us does more than the other, depending on the situation.

For instance, during my pregnancy, my husband couldn't carry the baby (obviously!), so he focused on supporting me.

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It seems like there's this idea around marriage being 50-50, when in reality (and take it from someone who's been with her partner for over 14 years!) It's more like 30-70, 90-10, and everything else in between.

As life happens, our roles can change, and our expectations of our partner and of ourselves are going to change, and that's ok. That's to be expected.

So why fight it? Why fight with yourself and your husband to try to keep things 'fair' to have this whole thought process of, 'he got to do this, so I get to do this.'

Ugh, that's just so exhausting to try and maintain!

Now, here's the thing we've learned that I want to share with you: communication is key!

It's so important to have open and honest conversations about our expectations and workload distribution. If we don't talk about it, how can we know what the other person needs? Resentment can build up, and that's the last thing we want in our marriage.

And here's a little secret – it's okay to outsource some things!

Seriously, instead of arguing over who does what, we find solutions that work for both of us.

I'm not a fan of grocery shopping, especially with three kids in tow. I would need two carts! So, we decided to outsource grocery shopping, and it's been a game-changer! The amount of time I have back in my week! I love it!

Life isn't always fair, and we have to accept that. There will be moments when one of us needs more support or help, and that's okay. It's all about being a team, supporting each other through thick and thin, and finding those solutions together.

Now, one thing that we've made a priority is spending time together outside of all the adulting responsibilities.

Do you remember those fun date nights when we were dating?

Well, we've decided to keep that spark alive by going on regular dates and having fun together. It's a way to reconnect and remember why we fell in love in the first place.

But don't let the thought of a date night out stop you! Some of our favorite date nights are the ones after the kids go to bed, and we make steak or eat the special ice cream hiding in the freezer.

So, let's ditch the idea of a perfect 50-50 balance and our unrealistic marriage expectations.

Instead, let's focus on being a strong team, communicating openly, and cherishing the time we have together.

Life is full of surprises, and with the right attitude and love, we can navigate any challenge that comes our way.

Remember, your marriage is unique, and what works for someone else might not work for you. Embrace the journey, learn from each other, and keep that flame burning bright.

Together, we can make our marriages stronger and more fulfilling than ever before!

So, the next time you find yourself frustrated with your partner, take a step back and ask yourself why you're upset.

Have you communicated your needs and expectations?

If not, it's time to sit down and have that conversation. Trust me, it'll make a world of difference.

Let's show our kids what a loving and supportive partnership looks like, even when it's not always equal. Let's prioritize our marriage, cherish each other, and keep building beautiful memories together. After all, life's too short to sweat the small stuff, and with love on our side, we can conquer anything that comes our way.